Posts Tagged ‘christian’

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Those pesky abominations!

November 1, 2007

Monday’s episode of Jeopardy (which I watched last night; ah, the joy that is TiVo) included a category called “Biblical Abominations.”  Normally, I hate it when a category that’s based on the bible is included in the game.  However, I figured I would enjoy this category as I assumed it would hint at the hypocritical behavior of xtians.

Homosexuality is the “abomination” xtians repeat the most often.  They love to quote passages from Leviticus that say, supposedly, homosexuality is evil.  I’ve always wondered why xtians are so hellbent against homosexuality when there are plenty of other abominations, i.e. sin, that they freely commit.

To my delight, none of the Jeopardy answers had to do with homosexuality.   Instead, the Jeopardy writers included the abominations of eating shellfish, and the ban on anything to do with bugs, eagles, incense and Egypt.  Wow!  Egypt is an abomination?  Tut would have been so proud.

So, despite the abomination that is shellfish, I’ve never encountered a xtian eschewing a lobster or a clam.  In fact, I’ve even seen ads for church sponsored clambakes.  Likewise, I’ve never heard a xtian parent scold a child for committing a sin by playing with a caterpillar or a ladybug.  Oh, and what about incense?  Don’t the catholics love to swing around their purses full of incense during mass?  They should be going straight to hell for that.

Furthermore, xtians claim that the US is a xtian nation because the “founding fathers” wanted it that way.  (Uh, that’s a big lie.)  Nonetheless, the symbol of this great xtian nation is an eagle.  Ha!  Eagles are an abomination!  Ooh, those xtians who covet eagles are sinners! Since it’s in the bible, it has to be true.  Right?

When did xtians decide which abominations are worse than others?  And how could they do that?  If god said something is an abomination, it can’t be changed just because some xtians choose not to obey the word of god.  It’s not rational that xtians are so against one supposed abomination when they freely engage in other abominable behaviors.  Isn’t an abomination is an abomination?

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Wacko gems!

October 23, 2007

There’s so much crazy out there today, I’m feeling a bit woozy…

 Ark Building 101

Baylor University offers a major in Church Recreation.  Huh?  Do xtians find it hard to figure out how to serve punch and cookies?  There has to be more to it than that.  What do Church Recreation majors study?  Book burning?  Ark building?  I wonder if ‘running with the stations of the cross’ is an advanced course.

Baby Desperation

Some wacko couple in Florida was so desperate to have a child that they paid a woman to get pregnant (i.e. with her own egg) with the husband’s sperm.  The couple had a verbal agreement with the woman, but they did not enter into a contract with her.  Once the baby arrived, the surrogate decided to keep the baby.  Ooops.

If the couple was so desperate to have another child (they already have one child, born from a surrogate) why didn’t they adopt?  There are thousands of children waiting for people to take them in and provide them permanent, loving homes.  If someone is really so desperate to become a parent, how can that person neglect the fact that there are so many unwanted kids?  I am so tired of hearing about the self-induced anguish of infertile couples!  They complain about surrogacy, the pain of miscarriages, and the gobs of money spent on infertility treatment.  Who cares?!  Stop being so selfish and adopt!

War Trumps Kids!

Chimpy vetoed (10/03/2007) legislation that would provide $35 billion in healthcare for children.  Nonetheless, that fool has asked (10/22/2007) Congress for another $46 billion to fund his acts of aggression.  By vetoing the SCHIP bill, he let the nation know that he doesn’t care about sick, poor kids.  And now, less than three weeks later, we find out that his so-called war is more important to him than the welfare of children.  Oh, that’s nice.  What a hero.  He’s taken so much money from the treasury for his games (the chimpco idiots don’t even know where it all goes) and kickbacks to his friends, but he doesn’t have the heart to help kids.  Disgusting.

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Biblical truth…

October 22, 2007

So, the wackos at CitizenLink (brought to you by the Focus on the Family nutjobs) are foaming at the mouth over the documentary, For the Bible Tells Me So.  Apparently, they don’t like that the documentary, according to them, denies biblical truth.

Hmmm…there’s truth in the bible?  Isn’t that an oxymoron?

I don’t believe that a book that is composed of fables, which xtians use to deny scientific fact (i.e. truth), is anything more than a work of fiction.  The bible contains no more truth than the Mother Goose rhymes or the Grimm tales.

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Want some jesus with that?

October 22, 2007

Jeebus and pizza, oh, what a combo!

The Sun-Sentinel printed a short review of Phil’s Calzone Factory.  As a calzone devotee, and tiring of my usual calzone from Vito’s, I decided to give Phil’s a try.  Upon arriving at the shop, a typical strip mall joint, I headed right for the counter, picked up a menu and ordered a calzone.  With my order placed and bill paid, I turned around to find a place to sit.  The first thing I saw was a small table piled with xtian propaganda pamphlets.  Yuck!  I told myself that a prior customer must have dumped the pamphlets there.  After turning back around to the counter, I noticed all kinds of xtian signs, stickers, and crosses.  And then I noticed that the xtian paraphenalia is posted all over the store.  There were so many items extolling the benefits of bowing to jeebus, that I can’t believe that I didn’t notice any of it upon entering the shop.  The more I looked around, the more propaganda I saw.  I was so disgusted.  I wish I would have noticed the jeebus crap before shelling out $25 to the jeebus freaks who must own Phil’s Calzone Factory.

I don’t need to have religion shoved down my throat while patronizing a pizza shop! 

While still reeling from the sight of the xtian decor, I noticed a back room; I thought I could seek refuge there.  Not so!  The back room is even more horrifying.  This room features a long banquet-style table piled end to end with all manner of xtian pamphlets, books, newspapers, and cards.  Above the table is a huge banner printed with “Jesus Is Your Savior” on it (in red, of all colors.)  My feet couldn’t get me out of that room fast enough!

What are these people thinking?  My guess is that they are insecure about their religion.  They posted all of the crap around the store because they need a constant reminder that they’ve chosen not to believe in reality.  This calzone joint should be called Phil’s Xtian Factory, Indoctrination Center, and Propaganda Hut.  Potential patrons need to know what to expect when contemplating doing business with Phil’s.  I wish there had been a huge cross on the door to warn me about what was inside the shop.  Nonetheless, I can’t blame the Phil’s people for my calzone induced tunnel vision.

Despite the owner’s devotion to jeebus, the calzone wasn’t extraordinary.  If the calzone had been incredibly scrumptious, I cannot imagine the dilemma I would have faced.  Would I give more money to jeebus freaks to enjoy something superb?  Since the calzone wasn’t something that I have to have again, I can say that I will never return to Phil’s.

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Religious Jewels

October 14, 2007

If there truly is a god, why are there so many different religions (especially of the xtian type)?  Wouldn’t an omniscient creator make sure that all humans followed the one ‘true’ religion that this creator made?

When confronted with logic and reason, religion makes no sense.

For instance, if this god is so great and wonderful, why is it that Mother Theresa, who chose to live in poverty, faced a never ending battle in aiding the poor, hungry, and sick?  While her work was important, her great efforts didn’t put an end to poverty in Calcutta.  Despite all of her work, the god she prayed to didn’t help her.  In the meantime, the so-called ‘men of god’ sat high and pretty at the Vatican, within the walls of palaces enjoying plenty of food, jewels, and fancy clothes.

It doesn’t make sense.

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Equality includes marriage

October 12, 2007

Glassy eyed, lying Mitty boy took another step toward winning ‘bigot of the year’ with his recent gay discrimination remarks.  Oy, what an idiot.  Once again, he asserted that only straight couples can get married.  Then he claimed that he doesn’t believe in discriminating against gay people.  Reality check to Mitty–you can’t have it both ways!  Oh, and he also had to mention that he had a gay person in his cabinet while governor of Massachusetts.  Tokenism doesn’t make equality.

If Romney had said, “I’m not racist, look I had a black person in my cabinet, but they shouldn’t be at the front of the bus” or “I’m not anti-Semitic, I hired a Jew once, but they shouldn’t be allowed to own businesses” his comment would have made headlines.  Unfortunately, he got away with his stupid comments because it’s OK to bash gay people. 

Romney, and other wacko, xtian neocons are so convinced that they are right.  However, their argument for “traditional” marriage can’t stand when confronted with truth and reality.  If marriage exists solely for reproduction and raising kids:

Why are people who don’t want children allowed to get married?

Why are women who have gone through menopause able to get married?

Why are infertile people allowed to get married?

Why isn’t there a test to prove that one is fertile before marriage?

Why is it biologically possible to produce children outside of marriage?

Why are people allowed to divorce once they’ve reproduced?

Yep, some pretty silly questions to illustrate the stupidity of the “traditional marriage” nutjobs.  The reality is, marriage has nothing to do with producing and raising kids.  Rearing children without marriage has happened since the beginning of time.

The equal marriage debate concerns the special rights available to married people.  How can Romney say he’s against discrimination, and then deny gay people certain rights (e.g. inheritance, social security benefits, health care, tax breaks.)  What do these rights have to do with producing and raising children?  Because these special rights are granted by the government, they have to be available to everyone.  We cannot pick and choose which groups of people get which rights.  It’s against the constitution.  Our government should stop granting marriages.  Let’s just call them civil unions.

A marriage license is granted by the state, not a church.  Religious marriage has nothing to do with civil marriage and its rights, privileges, and protections.  If people want to get married in a church, so be it.  I don’t care.  But don’t take rights away from me just because you’re a bigot.

One last question:  if xtians are so convinced that children need to be in families with one man and one woman, why is that, across the country, there are thousands of unwanted children in state custody?

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National Coming Out Day

October 11, 2007

Since I’ve been out for decades now, I’ll devote this post to knocking neocons off their crosses.

Hey, you jeebus twits–if you love me so freaking much, leave me alone!  Do your mumbo jumbo talk amongst yourselves; I don’t want to be bothered by nutsos who think someone up in the sky talks to them.

You people really expect me to take advice from you all?  From people who believe in some collective imaginary friend?  Uh, no can do!

Guess what?  I don’t have a sick need to make myself take stock in a make believe world.  A delusional world where some white man, dressed up like a kid in a Halloween ghost costume, sits on my shoulder whispering into my ear.  That’s some freaky crap.

Ah, that’s better!  Happy Coming Out Day!