Posts Tagged ‘bible’

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The myth of christian charity.

November 1, 2007

Flamingo Road Church (a South Florida mega-church) recently closed a soup kitchen that they ran in Hallandale Beach.  According to the church’s spokespeople, the church closed the food program because none of the volunteers were church members.   

What?!

Hmmm…despite the need for the food program, the church closed down the operation because no one in their church is xtian enough to volunteer to feed the hungry.  So, the volunteers that did staff the food program aren’t good enough for Flamingo Road Church?  The fact that food was getting to the hungry wasn’t reason enough to keep the place open?  Oh, jeebus would be proud!

The church claims that the food program will reopen at some point in the future.  I guess that’ll be once they can brainwash enough of their flock to do the work.  A Flamingo Road Church apologist says:  “They are doing this to make it ten times better. It is hard to make it better while the ministry is goingo [sic] on. It is going to take a break to come back better than it ever was before.”

Yeah…while the hungry people are starving to death, they can comfort themselves with the knowledge that the church just needed a little reorganization.  Well, at least this shows that faith based initiatives don’t work.  A non-faith organization would not stop helping the needy due to such a ridiculous notion.  Oh, wait, I get it now…the hungry people aren’t xtian, and Flamingo Road wasn’t successful in shoving jeebus down their throats with the food, so they closed up shop.  Of course, it’s all so clear now.

Those Flamingo Road xtians are clever.  They told a big lie so that the “volunteers” would look bad, not the church.  Well, I’m sure that the people who depended on the food program will understand Flamingo Road’s decision.  I wonder where in the xtian magic book of lies it says, “Ye who do not succumb to jeebus shall not receive food from xtians!”

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Those pesky abominations!

November 1, 2007

Monday’s episode of Jeopardy (which I watched last night; ah, the joy that is TiVo) included a category called “Biblical Abominations.”  Normally, I hate it when a category that’s based on the bible is included in the game.  However, I figured I would enjoy this category as I assumed it would hint at the hypocritical behavior of xtians.

Homosexuality is the “abomination” xtians repeat the most often.  They love to quote passages from Leviticus that say, supposedly, homosexuality is evil.  I’ve always wondered why xtians are so hellbent against homosexuality when there are plenty of other abominations, i.e. sin, that they freely commit.

To my delight, none of the Jeopardy answers had to do with homosexuality.   Instead, the Jeopardy writers included the abominations of eating shellfish, and the ban on anything to do with bugs, eagles, incense and Egypt.  Wow!  Egypt is an abomination?  Tut would have been so proud.

So, despite the abomination that is shellfish, I’ve never encountered a xtian eschewing a lobster or a clam.  In fact, I’ve even seen ads for church sponsored clambakes.  Likewise, I’ve never heard a xtian parent scold a child for committing a sin by playing with a caterpillar or a ladybug.  Oh, and what about incense?  Don’t the catholics love to swing around their purses full of incense during mass?  They should be going straight to hell for that.

Furthermore, xtians claim that the US is a xtian nation because the “founding fathers” wanted it that way.  (Uh, that’s a big lie.)  Nonetheless, the symbol of this great xtian nation is an eagle.  Ha!  Eagles are an abomination!  Ooh, those xtians who covet eagles are sinners! Since it’s in the bible, it has to be true.  Right?

When did xtians decide which abominations are worse than others?  And how could they do that?  If god said something is an abomination, it can’t be changed just because some xtians choose not to obey the word of god.  It’s not rational that xtians are so against one supposed abomination when they freely engage in other abominable behaviors.  Isn’t an abomination is an abomination?

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My UFO is bigger than your bible!

October 31, 2007

The bimbos at The Today Show poked fun (hmmm…they never giggle when a  neocon talks about jeebus) at Dennis Kucinich because of his comment about UFOs.  It’s just like NBC (except for Countdown with Keith Olbermann) to run with fluff, instead of covering the real news.

During last night’s debate, Kucinich implied that chimpy is going crazy, and he called for chimpy’s impeachment.  Hooray!  But the NBC bimbos didn’t even allude to Kucinich’s great statements.  They, along with the rest of the mainstream media, have adopted the mantra of chimpco:  if you don’t talk about it, it didn’t happen, and if you repeat a lie enough, people will believe it did happen.

Chimpy’s last press conference is an example of this neocon chicanery.  Chimpy had the gaul to say that Congress has been wasting time.  Everyone at the black house, except for idiot chimpy, knows that this is the busiest Congress since 1978.  But they want the “amuricun” people to think that Congress is not working.  Talking heads pillbaugh and o’fetish will pick up chimpy’s talking point, and then the 27% will write it in their bibles as another “truth.”

So, Kucinich is portrayed as a fool for his UFO comment, while chimpy “god talks to me” gets another pass.  Oh, I yearn for a government full of politicians who see UFOs rather than those freaks who hide behind their bibles.

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Biblical truth…

October 22, 2007

So, the wackos at CitizenLink (brought to you by the Focus on the Family nutjobs) are foaming at the mouth over the documentary, For the Bible Tells Me So.  Apparently, they don’t like that the documentary, according to them, denies biblical truth.

Hmmm…there’s truth in the bible?  Isn’t that an oxymoron?

I don’t believe that a book that is composed of fables, which xtians use to deny scientific fact (i.e. truth), is anything more than a work of fiction.  The bible contains no more truth than the Mother Goose rhymes or the Grimm tales.